Have you ever heard a piece of advice you agreed was extremely valuable, and responded with a nod?
But what happened after that? Did you take the information on board and applied it to your life? Or were you simply content with agreeing?
Agreeing with advice – and responding with a nod – but not applying the advice is what I call The Nod Effect.
You need to eat healthy food.
Nod.
You need to treat others with respect.
Nod.
Exercise is good for your health.
Nod.
But nodding doesn’t help you improve your life, even though – for some strange reason – nodding feels like an accomplishment! It’s as if, by nodding, you have taken on some of the advice, even though the value of the advice is in applying it and not simply agreeing with it.
I believe that, to a large degree, those who nod to the advice they hear and smile in agreement are “secretly” guilty for not applying the advice in their lives, even though it’s an obvious piece of advice.
Did you just nod? 😛
The people that make me feel apprehensive are those that rattle their heads in agreement, but don’t end up following any of the advice you give them!
To make real progress in life you have to shift your focus from showing approval to making use of the information you hear. Rather than nodding in agreement, silently say to yourself:
“I agree with what I just hear, but why am I not using this information already? And what change can I do right now to apply this information in my life?”
8 replies on “The Nod Effect”
Oh my God, I did Nod 😀
It happens to the best of us 🙂
Thank God I only smiled : D
But I hope it’s not with the same intention 😉
It’s so true how friends come to you for advice and when it’s you with the problem, you find yourself following through with the advice you gave to someone else. That’s messed up!
What I meant to say is, you don’t follow your own advice. That’s what’s messed up. You know the answer, yet you respond as if it’s all new to you.
Ha! Ha! I didn’t realize the nodding meant I agreed. I thought it meant I hear you. I don’t always agree when I nod. In fact I very seldom agree, but I hear what their saying.
@Diane: I nod for the same reason you do (most of the time): to acknowledge what is being said. Speakers usually want some sort of feedback while they speak, and nodding can be a gentle gesture for that.
The nodding we should watch out for is showing approval, and being contented with that: showing approval.