Categories
Emotions

Worry: The Surprising Path To Happiness

Worry: The Surprising Path To Happiness
“Don’t worry, be happy.” ~ XXX
We have been culturally conditioned to consider worry as the antithesis of happiness and a thing of pure evil.
This understanding of worry perpetuates a misunderstanding of negative emotions and the role they play in our lives.
While worry might not be a pleasant emotion to experience, it plays a vital role in driving us towards appropriate action and – ultimately – happiness.
Human Nature Is Beautiful
It’s wrong to believe that positive emotions are good and negative emotions are bad. All emotions are good. Or, at least, they have the potential to be good, depending on what action they lead us to take.
Deriving joy from other people’s misfortunes might feel good, but it isn’t a healthy response to human suffering, and will ultimately lead us to destructive conduct.
Worry is an emotional response to circumstances. Or, to be more accurate, it’s a response to thoughts about circumstances.
You face relationship problems, and so you worry.
You don’t know how to make financial ends meet, and so you worry.
You have health problems, and so you worry.
Your mind doesn’t want you to suffer. It generates the emotion of worry so that you can take action to fix a potentially harmful situation.
Without worry, you might ignore your problems rather than find solutions for them. Evasion can be deadly, and so your mind steps in to ensure that you have the emotional reminder that something needs to be done about the problems you’re facing.
Worry isn’t harmful. It’s a beautiful, healthy response.
Provided it’s for the right reasons and to the right degree.
Healthy Worry
While our emotions can play an invaluable role in our survival, we often develop unhealthy emotional associations that jeopardize our well-being.
Remember, your emotions are the result of your thoughts about reality. If you have the mental habit of focusing solely on problems and concluding that you’re in a crisis, when you’re not, you may experience worry even when there’s no real cause to worry.
Why is public speaking such a frightening experience?
We speak to people on a daily basis, but speaking to a group of people while standing on a stage and commanding their attention makes us worry about screwing up, being laughed at or mocked for our presentation skills.
The calculations that we make in assessing a public speaking experience are inaccurate. They amplify the threats in a way that generates high (and unhealthy) amounts of fear and worry, leading to poor performances or missed opportunities.
Healthy worry is when we feel inclined to learn more and do more so that we can achieve our goals and avoid falling into unfavorable situations that we are able to avoid.
Unhealthy worry is that which paralyzes us from taking action and is often the outcome of a wild imagination that makes the world seem hellbent on making us suffer.
To condemn yourself for experiencing any sort of worry isn’t a healthy attitude to negative emotions, since they’re on your side and can assist you in moving your life forward.
How Worry Leads To Happiness
In order to harness the power of worry to experience happiness, here are 3 steps for you to take:
1- Listen to your emotions: What are you feeling? And why are you feeling it? Your emotions are trying to tell you something, and you must figure out what the message is so you can take appropriate action. If you’re worried, what could your body be telling you? What problem must you face?
2- Develop an action-bias: Rather than simply think about your problems, shift your focus on what you can do about them. What actions can you take to fix the problems you’re facing? Who can you ask to help? What do you need to learn more about? Push yourself to take action to fix your problems, rather than allow your worries to engulf you. After all, that’s what your mind and body want you to do.
3- Accept what you can’t change: If you absolutely can’t do anything about a situation, then there’s no need to worry. To worry about things you cannot change means that you’re living by a mental model that doesn’t match the reality you’re living, which is generating emotions that aren’t supporting you in taking appropriate action.
Happiness comes from embracing who we are as human beings (without condemning ourselves for experiencing negative emotions), to act appropriately in the face of the challenges we face in life and to accept reality for what it is.
And worry is one of many emotions in our human arsenal that can help us towards achieving happiness.

“Don’t worry, be happy.” ~ Bobby McFerrin

We have been culturally conditioned to consider worry as the antithesis of happiness and a thing of pure evil.

This understanding of worry perpetuates a misunderstanding of negative emotions and the role they play in our lives.

While worry might not be a pleasant emotion to experience, it plays a vital role in driving us towards appropriate action and – ultimately – happiness.

Human Nature Is Beautiful

It’s wrong to believe that positive emotions are good and negative emotions are bad.

All emotions are good.

Or, at least, they have the potential to be good, depending on what action they lead us to take.

Deriving joy from other people’s misfortunes might feel good, but it isn’t a healthy response to human suffering, and will ultimately lead us to destructive conduct.

Worry is an emotional response to circumstances. Or, to be more accurate, it’s a response to thoughts about circumstances.

You face relationship problems, and so you worry.

You don’t know how to make financial ends meet, and so you worry.

You have health problems, and so you worry.

Your mind doesn’t want you to suffer. It generates the emotion of worry so that you can take action to fix a potentially harmful situation.

Without worry, you might ignore your problems rather than find solutions for them. Evasion can be deadly, and so your mind steps in to ensure that you have the emotional reminder that something needs to be done about the problems you’re facing.

Worry isn’t harmful. It’s a beautiful, healthy response.

Provided it’s for the right reasons and to the right degree.

Healthy Worry

While our emotions can play an invaluable role in our survival, we often develop unhealthy emotional associations that jeopardize our well-being.

Remember, your emotions are the result of your thoughts about reality. If you have the mental habit of focusing solely on problems and concluding that you’re in a crisis, when you’re not, you may experience worry even when there’s no real cause to worry.

Why is public speaking such a frightening experience?

We speak to people on a daily basis, but speaking to a group of people while standing on a stage and commanding their attention makes us worry about screwing up, being laughed at or mocked for our presentation skills.

The calculations that we make in assessing a public speaking experience are inaccurate. They amplify the threats in a way that generates high (and unhealthy) amounts of fear and worry, leading to poor performances or missed opportunities.

Healthy worry is when we feel inclined to learn more and do more so that we can achieve our goals and avoid falling into unfavorable situations that we are able to avoid.

Unhealthy worry is that which paralyzes us from taking action and is often the outcome of a wild imagination that makes the world seem hellbent on making us suffer.

To condemn yourself for experiencing any sort of worry isn’t a healthy attitude to negative emotions, since they’re on your side and can assist you in moving your life forward.

How Worry Leads To Happiness

In order to harness the power of worry to experience happiness, here are 3 steps for you to take:

1- Listen to your emotions: What are you feeling? And why are you feeling it? Your emotions are trying to tell you something, and you must figure out what the message is so you can take appropriate action. If you’re worried, what could your body be telling you? What problem must you face?

2- Develop an action-bias: Rather than simply think about your problems, shift your focus on what you can do about them. What actions can you take to fix the problems you’re facing? Who can you ask to help? What do you need to learn more about? Push yourself to take action to fix your problems, rather than allow your worries to engulf you. After all, that’s what your mind and body want you to do.

3- Accept what you can’t change: If you absolutely can’t do anything about a situation, then there’s no need to worry. Worrying about things you cannot change means that you’re living by a mental model that doesn’t match the reality you’re living, which is generating emotions that aren’t supporting you in taking appropriate action.

Happiness comes from embracing who we are as human beings (without condemning ourselves for experiencing negative emotions), to act appropriately in the face of the challenges we face in life and to accept reality for what it is.

And worry is one of the many emotions in our human arsenal that can help us take appropriate action and achieve happiness.

Categories
Balance Personal Growth Map

Lead A Balanced Life Today – Free Ebook

Lead A Balanced Life Today - Ebook Cover

I’m very proud and excited to be sharing with you my latest creation (and first ebook!).

OK, it’s not a lengthy piece, but brevity is an advantage in my humble opinion. 😉

So What’s This Ebook About?

It’s about creating life balance in your life today, and not when you retire or become a millionaire.

The ebook looks at some common misconceptions about life balance and why it matters to your success.

It also gives the most comprehensive explanation of the Personal Growth Map to date, and how you can start using it to gain control over your life and accelerate your personal growth.

Why Should I Care?

Since you’re on a personal growth site I suspect you’re interested in personal growth (I’ve been told that I’m a genius, and this level of reasoning seems to prove it :P).

But personal growth isn’t always easy. In fact, it’s usually overwhelming. There’s just too much to read and do that you can feel scattered by all the topics you read about.

The Personal Growth Map helps to add structure to your life and identify the needs you must fulfill as a human being.

Trying to achieve success in one area of your life while neglecting all other areas will not only compromise your well-being but your chances of achieving success in that life area you’re focusing on.

This easy-to-read ebook explains why that’s the case and how you can begin to infuse your life with greater balance so you can make progress in every area of your life.

Where’s The Download Link, Dammit?!

There’s no download link, but there is a subscription form at the bottom of this post to subscribe to my “New Life” e-newsletter. Once you confirm your subscription you’ll automatically receive a link to download the ebook.

(If you’re reading this in an email or RSS reader you might need to click here to see the subscription form)

But I Already Receive Too Many Emails!

While I would love to offer the ebook on the site, I believe it serves as a great introduction to life balance, but there’s a lot more we need to cover to make life balance a reality in your life.

That’s why an email newsletter is a more suitable medium to offer you further information about how you can create balance in your life, and it also gives you a chance to email me any feedback, questions and suggestions.

I won’t be abusing your Inbox with lots of emails (usually one email a week), and you can always unsubscribe if you no longer wish to hear from me.

OK, I’m In! <– This is what you’re meant to be saying by now

That’s great!

Simply add your name and email address to the form below and make sure you click on the link in the confirmation email you receive.

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